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By: Vadim Kotelnikov

Inventor and Founder

Ten3 Business e-Coach

1000ventures,   1000advices.com

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Author of the Smart & Fast mini-course


Wise Listening 360: Three Levels

"A good listener is not only popular everywhere, but after a while he knows something." ~ Wilson Mizner 


Effective Communication Effective Listening Effective Speaking 1000ventures.com 1000advices.com Ten3 global polls "Advise!" Ten3 global polls "Advise!" Ten3 Business e-Coach EFFECTIVE COMMUNICATION: Effective Listening vs. Effective Talking



Benefits of Active Listening

Would you like to:

To Listen Well You Must:

  1. Be able to hear what's being said

  2. Actively focus your attention on what's being said

  3. Understand and accept what's being said for what it is, independent of your feelings about it

  4. Evaluate what has been said

  5. Give feedback

Wise Negotiation DOs and DON'Ts


Types of Listening

  1. Empathizing: Drawing out the speaker and getting information in a supportive, helpful way

  2. Analyzing: Seeking concrete information and trying to separate fact from emotion.

  3. Synthesizing: Proactively guiding the exchange towards an objective.


 Discover more!

  Communication  (By: Vadim Kotelnikov)

10 Rules of Listening: 1. Stop Talking!...  (By: Linda Eve Diamond)

12 Rules of Effective Listening  (By: Geoffrey Nightingale)

Amazing Empathic Listening Technique  (By: Stephen Covey)

5 Listening Techniques  (By: Vadim Kotelnikov)

12 Active Listening Tips  (By: Vadim Kotelnikov)

Listening Quotes

Confucius about Communication

14 Ways To Nourish Conflict  (By: Linda Eve Diamond)

Humorous Quotes: Communication

  Effective Selling  (By: Vadim Kotelnikov)

Selling by Listening  (By: Kerry L. Johnson)

Understand and Fulfill Needs of Others

One of the golden rules of the therapy profession is that everyone needs at least one person with whom they can openly and unashamedly discuss every little detail happenings, desires, fears of their life, whether it is from the past, present, or future.

Your People Skills 360

There are other psychological needs to be accepted unconditionally, appreciated, recognized, respected, desired, valued, approved of, or complimented that affect the way we communicate with each other. Listen carefully, ask questions to show that you are genuinely interested and you'll be amazed at the spin-offs from becoming a good question asker and a good listener. People appreciate, respect and value others who are great listeners.

Yin-Yang of Communication

Yin-Yang of Listening

NLP Solutions: Engage All of Your Senses

Most people simply listen to the words that are being said to them, but words contain only 10% of the message. The remaining 90% is hidden in the body language and the tone of voice. Understanding body language can help you look beyond what people say to what they really mean.

To remember better what's being communicated to you, try to engage all your senses  whilst listening  as human brain stores pictures, feelings, smells and tastes more effectively than words. Understand you preferred mode of thinking, your mental map: whether you are a visual ('see' the world), auditory ('hear' the world), or a kinesthetic ('feel' the world). If you are a visual, when you're listening to someone, first of all make what they're are telling you into a movie. As brains remember better things that are out of the ordinary, you can try distorting pictures or making them funny.

To enhance the effect, add sounds, link feelings to your movies, put the taste and smells in. And exaggerate everything.3

10 Great Communication Quotes

Barriers to Effective Listening

Often we have too much difficulty listening to other people because1:

  • we "know" what we are going to hear;

  • we are seeking confirmation, not information;

  • what's being said is getting in the way of what needs be said.

Active Listening

Active listening involves playing back your own interpretation of what has been said in acknowledgement - 'As I see it, what you mean is...'

Asking Effective Questions

Know which questions to ask it will help you get the right response.

Selling By Listening

Great salespeople are great listeners. The most critical communication skill for anyone in the business world managers, innovators, salespeople, and customer service specialists is effective listening. People don't buy what you wish to sell. They buy what they need. Selling is not happening when you are talking.

Selling is happening when your prospect is talking, and you are listening actively and passionately, listening to your prospect's emotions to find the right fit.

Synergistic Selling

Pretending Ignorance

Pretend ignorance. Smart is dumb.

Socrates used this technique more than 2300 years ago. He pretended ignorance in order to encourage others to express their views fully.

Today, many world's smartest and fastest businesspeople have perfected this art consciously or unconsciously of paying dumb. "People who try to impress by pretending to be smart generally aren't. Truly smart people know that by playing dumb and asking the other party to repeat or explain things several times, asking lots of questions, they'll be better prepared to respond and then make a fast decision."6