If you made a list of the reasons why any couple got married, and another list of the reasons for their divorce, you'd have a hell of a lot of overlapping.

Mignon McLaughlin

Getting divorced just because you don't love a man is almost as silly as getting married just because you do.

Zsa Zsa Gabor

My husband and I divorced over religious differences. He thought he was God, and I didn't.

Unknown author

She cried, and the judge wiped her tears with my checkbook.

Tommy Manville

Alimony is like buying oats for a dead horse.

Arthur Baer

Alimony Ė The ransom that the happy pay to the devil.

H.L. Mencken

If you think you have trouble supporting a wife, try not supporting her.

Unknown author

My divorce came to me as a complete surprise. Thatís what happens when you havenít been home in eighteen years.

 Lee Travino

One reason people get divorced is that they run out of gift ideas.

Unknown author

Ah, yes, divorce Ö from the Latin word meaning to rip out a manís genitals through his wallet.

Robin Williams

You donít know a women till youíve met her in court.

Norman Mailer

Love, the quest; marriage, the conquest; divorce, the inquest.

Helen Rowland

The only solid and lasting peace between a man and his wife is, doubtless, a separation.

Lord Chesterfield

The difference between a divorce and a legal separation is that a legal separation gives a husband time to hide his money.

Johnny Carson

I donít think Iíll get married again. Iíll just find a woman I donít like and give her a house.

Lewis Grizzard

Iím an excellent housekeeper. Every time I get a divorce, I keep the house.

Zsa Zsa Gabor

The happiest time in any man's life is just after the first divorce.

John Kenneth Galbraith

Divorce is a declaration of independence with only two signers.

Gerard Lieberman




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